Dispatch from Forbearance Presbyterian Church
When the Fat Lady Sings
by Charlotte Johnstone
Last Sunday morning during Forbearance’s
coffee hour, Camilla Hustisford, wife of Rev. Hustisford, found herself
sitting on a sofa next to Arlene
Brannigan-Stewart, a young woman married several years ago at Forbearance
and now in the ninth month of her first pregnancy.
“Well, it won’t be long now, Arlene,” Camilla remarked.
“How are you feeling?”
“Like a beached whale, if you know what I mean, Camilla,”
Arlene said. “I’ve gained more weight than I should have.
But aside from the fact that I waddle and I practically need a hoist
to turn over in bed and I have to go to the bathroom all the time and
I need help to get my shoes on, I suppose I’m fine. I just wish
I knew what it was going to be like. I mean, I’ve read all the
books, Brad and I went to all the birthing classes and I practice my
breathing exercises, but I don’t really know, you know? I’ve
never done this before, so I guess it’s natural to be a little
anxious, but I really want it to be perfect.”
“What do you mean by ‘perfect’?” Camilla asked.
“Well, I want it to be . . . I don’t know . . . peaceful,
maybe. I want to stay calm and remember my breathing. And I don’t
want to be one of those women who yell a lot, ‘cuz I think that
would scare Brad and he already thinks he may pass out. I would like
to be in control so I can remember everything. I guess what I mean is
that I want to do a really good job.”
“Oh, Arlene, you’ll do a fine job, but you might want to
give yourself a break here. Giving birth isn’t like giving a performance
for an audience you have to please. When it’s ‘show time,’
your body and your baby will write their own script as you go and your
‘job’ will consist mostly of just going along for the ride.
You will be astonished by what your body can do – so trust yourself,
yell all you want at whomever you want, and let Brad take care of himself.
Forget all the usual ‘oughts’ and ‘shoulds’—you
don’t need to be ‘perfect.’ In fact, you don’t
even need to be ‘good.’ Be whatever you feel like
being and amaze yourself with what you’re capable of.”
“Well, you’ve done this four times, Camilla, so what was
it like for you the first time?”
“Me? The first time?” Camilla shook her head and laughed.
“Well, let’s just say that the one thing I hadn’t
figured on was going into labor during Forbearance’s Palm Sunday
service that year . . . .”
Charlotte Johnstone is a member of Immanuel
Presbyterian Church in Milwaukee, Wisconsin. She (and the cast of Forbearance
Presbyterian Church) welcome comments. Write to her at Horizons, 100
Witherspoon St., Louisville, KY 40202-1396 or email wjohns4949@aol.com.
How did Camilla, Rev. Hustisford and Forbearance
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