Preparing for a Death in the Family

Preparing for a Death in the Family
by Cynthia J. O’Brien

People ask me, “How can you do funerals? They must be so difficult.”

I like funerals. I like giving words of comfort and hope, crafting a memorial service and helping a family remember their loved one.

Sure, it’s difficult to see a family grieve, especially in tragic circumstances. Neither is it easy to lose a close friend. A dear man, whom I adored, Glenn, recently died of an aggressive cancer just months after he had come to faith in Jesus Christ at the age of 70. I baptized him last spring. “His Christian life was just beginning,” people said. His spiritual awakening was contagious. We all felt a deep sense of loss and I miss him.

But I loved planning and leading Glenn’s memorial service. It was awesome. Afterward, the staff and I were exuberant. The content of the service was not unusual—hymns, scripture, prayers, flowers and a time of sharing stories. But the whole thing was great. Person after person said, “That was a really good service.”

Cynthia O'Brien is pastor of Smith Memorial Presbyterian Church in Fairview, Oregon.

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